Embody Gratitude

We began the second quarter of our Rare Family Dynamics Group with a discussion about gratitude. Even when you are challenged, there are things you can be grateful for.

Gratitude can shift your mood and your perspective relatively quickly. It is a matter of. Where are you put your attention at any given moment?

Be grateful for everything

Can you be grateful for yourself and all that you do? Or maybe you're grateful for your family support. It can be really tricky to be grateful for the hard things that happen. In order to do this it's important to intentionally look for the good. This is not to say you skip over your feelings. Feel them. Move them. Be with them. If you skip over them, this is called "bypassing" and it will come back to bite you in the bottom.

A Gratitude list 

One suggestion is to make a Gratitude list every day. Make a list of the things you are grateful for that are happening and include three things you are grateful for that haven't  happened yet. Being grateful for future goodness is a way of magnetizing it to you.

Expanding

Expanding your perspective can help you shift from annoyance to gratitude. What if you could consistently see through the lens of gratitude? See what is happening in the moment, accept it and be grateful.

Gratitude is also especially helpful when you are communicating if you can feel the gratitude for the person you are communicating to. And remember, refrain from saying, I am grateful for this, but… When you use but erases everything that came before.

Gratitude transforms

Perhaps you have a situation where your children are constantly having seizures and you know that when they grow up, they won’t be able to hold down a job. Be grateful that you have a partner who takes on the planning and says "I'll figure it out." Even though it's sad and challenging that your children are having seizures, you have a partner who is in it with you and is willing to take on major responsibilities.

Here is a saying to support you staying in the present:

“I practice keeping my head where my feet are.“ (Thank you, Megan for this.)

Remain in the present

As a raregiver, it can be easy to go into catastrophic thinking. Maybe you're imagining the worst. One idea is to switch from using the word “yet” to using the words `` right now.”

For example, "We are not dealing with surgery right now.”

Self-care

When you're grateful for yourself, you do the things to make deposits in your health account. 

Do things like:

  • take a breath

  • Pause

  • Don't rush to respond

  • Box breathing, four breaths in, hold for four, out for six

Practice gratitude. It changes everything.

Coming up this week:  Nervous System Regulation - Staying embodied amidst change

This week our theme will be Nervous System Regulation. In the early stages of becoming a caregiver for your Rare child, you are asked to embrace many changes as you move from a working professional to a full-time caregiver. Many feelings will arise as you step into being an expert on your child’s Rare disease. It can be overwhelming to your nervous system. In this meeting, we will explore ways of staying calm, tending to all parts of you and taming the Inner Critic. You will learn tools for regulating your nervous system. Join us for a potent session.

You Belong Here

As a Raregiver, you belong here. We gather from across the world to support each other. Your presence is a contribution.

Zoom Link: Click Here

Looking forward to being with you,

Padma

Cristol O'Loughlin

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin is a seasoned executive and storyteller. As Founder and CEO of Raregivers™ (formerly ANGEL AID), Cristol is fiercely passionate about providing social, emotional, physical and financial relief to Raregivers™ ~ patients, caregivers, and professionals who hold both hope and grief in the same human heart. A former UCLA instructor, she co-founded advertising firm, The Craftsman Agency, and is humbled to have advised global brands such as NBA, Walt Disney Company, 20th Century Fox, Microsoft, Cisco and Google. During her tenure at IBM Life Sciences, she helped accelerate advancements in cheminformatics and data-driven biotechnology. Watch her TEDx talk ‘Caring for the Caregivers’ at https://www.raregivers.global/tedx and the ‘Raregivers LIVE’ broadcast from Microsoft to 12 cities around the world.

https://www.raregivers.global
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Staying Calm

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Comparative Suffering