Where We Go with Others
We are in the holiday season and our Rare Family Dynamics group focused on “where we go with others.” Do we show others compassion or empathy? And if so, do we cross our own boundaries when we see someone else is in need?
It's important to practice self-compassion and trust that others in your family and community will be OK even when you say no. As one of our members reminded us today, "NO is a complete sentence.’
Being a Pleaser/Fixer
If you identify as a “people pleaser,” you may be challenged to set boundaries–and boundaries with teenagers can be especially hard. If you want to set boundaries with your teenagers, it's important that you implement this yourself first.
For instance, don't answer your phone right away when it rings. Being fixated on our devices is one of the perils of the age of technology. And, don't do your work emails at 8 o'clock at night. Set a boundary of when you are stopping work and take time for yourself.
Pause and check in
For most of us, the holidays are a time when there is a lot to do especially as a raregiver. You can make a choice to either do or not do things during the holidays. It's an excellent idea to pace yourself, pause, notice your body, pay attention, and be curious about what you need.
Ways to take care of yourself: PAUSE
Take space during a family gathering by going for a walk or taking a nap.
Notice if you are taking on people’s energy when they are talking to you. You know that relative that likes to talk your ear off about their problems.… Excuse yourself when you need to.
Be honest about whether you need to bake the cookies or smoke a brisket. Store-bought cookies will have to suffice especially if you have a rare child and twins under one year old.
Remember to exercise and take alone time when you are visiting family. This is how it becomes sustainable
Connect to the Light Within
During the holiday time, it's helpful to access your inner light. We are approaching the longest night of the year–the Winter Solstice. Acknowledge the darkness, embrace your own dark places, and all of your feelings, and don't get stuck there.
Take time for meditation and prayer and bask in the light of your own essential goodness.
Enjoy the blessings of the Solstice and Christmas time as much as you can. 🎄🎄🎄❄️🧣⛄️
Coming up this week: The Places We Go When the Heart Is Open
This two-sided coin holds a lot for us. The vulnerability of an open heart can look like getting hurt, feeling betrayal and heartbreak or locking down into defensiveness. It can also bring many gifts of love and trust; which build us up into our super-human-selves. Today we will bravely explore both sides and the experience of “both” at the same time.
Please Join Us -- Our meetings continue through the holiday season :)
You may not realize how much you need the Angel Aid community until you find it.
Zoom Link: Click Here
Wishing you many blessings for this holiday season! 🎄🎄🎄
