The Emotional Landscape
This week we kicked off the fourth quarter of the year by diving into the landscape of our emotions. Emotions reside in our body, energetic awareness, and in our psyche. In order to know what you're feeling, you have to slow down– it can be scary to feel, especially as a parent of a Rare child.
Revel in the good
As a raregiver, you might live your life perpetually waiting for “the other shoe to drop.” There are times when things are going well. In those moments, it can be very useful to slow down and receive what is good. Notice how it feels in your body. Drink it in with your whole system…body, mind and heart.
Slow down, pause, show up and receive the goodness of the present moment. In this way, you are making deposits of goodness into your emotional bank account so that when things get hard, and they will, you will feel more resourced.
A challenge
For many of us, it can be hard to slow down, and being busy is one way of avoiding your feelings. Unfortunately, it is not a long-term solution because if you don't feel what’s here, it just builds up and eventually there will be a storehouse of emotions that will flood out just like a dam that breaks when the water level rises too high.
What if you could trust that you won't drown in an ocean of emotion? Feel your feelings a little bit at a time, kind of like, sipping on a hot cup of tea.
Take small sips, and then pause. Don't overdo it.
You might also become aware of any tendencies for doom spiraling or catastrophic thinking. As soon as you notice yourself going down one of these dark pathways in your mind, you can stop. Awareness is the key to having agency in your life.
With practice you'll be able to stop when you've only gone 85% of the way down the rabbit hole of darkness, then 70% down and eventually you will catch yourself when you've only gone 15% of the way down that scary rabbit hole.
It's helpful not to go too far because you have to go back the way you came.
Feel the grief
Take time to feel the grief like when a child in your community dies, feel the grief you feel for their family, and for your own. Take the time to experience the anticipatory grief. By doing this, you can lessen the tsunami wave of grief that may arise in the moment when it's your child who has left this world.
Set containers
Maybe you set containers for grieving which might include:
Working out, moving your energy and letting the tears flow
Journaling
Process painting with black or red
Breathing practice
Notice what you are feeding
You can feed the future trance that scares you, or you can feel what is here. Make a conscious choice to feel what you're feeling and say ‘no’ to feeding. Any scary thoughts.
Before, during and after
With any emotion, there is the ‘before, during and after.’ Emotions are finite. You might be able to notice each part of the cycle and the ‘during’ can feel really heavy. Trust that it will change.
Have faith and tend to your inner space of love and sacredness, which is bigger than any feeling. And the truth is, all feelings eventually pass.
Coming up next week: The Places we Go When Things Are Uncertain or Too Much
Every day we have different emotions. But when things feel uncertain or too much, it can take us into stress, overwhelm, anxiety, worry and many more places. When we better understand how these emotions feel and show up in our lives, we can label them from a distance instead of being wrapped up in them. I invite you in to dismantle the definitions we’ve given ourselves.
Please Join Us
You may not realize how much you need the Angel Aid community until you find it.
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We look forward to being with you soon.
