Navigating The Storms

The topic of our Rare Family Dynamics session this week was adjusting to the diagnosis. We talked about the necessity for resisting catastrophic thinking, assessing your capacity and learning to set boundaries.

Catastrophic Thinking

When you are navigating life with a Rare child, it can be easy to fall into catastrophic thinking. Maybe you wonder about what could be different in the future or things you should have done to change the past. Be mindful. Notice your train of thought, pause, and slow down. The antidote is to be with what is happening in the present moment.

A Practice for Noticing the Arising of Catastrophic Thinking

Where do you feel it in your body? What are the sensations? What are the thoughts that come to mind? Once you can see the pattern, you are at choice. It is from a place of resting quietly in yourself that you will be able to see what is needed. This way you can respond rather than react out of fear.

You Are In Charge

In order for you to be in charge of yourself, you need to take time to nourish yourself. Many Raregivers feel like they might not have time for self-care, to do the little things that stabilize you from the inside out. Take the time for yourself.

Remember, when you don’t take care of yourself, little things can trigger you and take you down those scary, rabbit holes which is no fun at all.

Relinquish Control

You are not in control of what happens to your Rare child and you are in charge of how you respond. For example, you can’t control your child’s seizures or whether she goes to the doctor now that she’s an adult. What you can control is your thoughts. 

You can watch the storms arise as you would on a summer’s day. Stay inside where you’ll be cozy and dry. You do not need to get soaked and blown about by the passing storms. 

A Useful Affirmation

Repeat this affirmation several times a day. “ I’m not in control and I am in charge.” By doing this, you are training your subconscious mind through repetition.

Coming up this week  Loving What Is: Communicating the Hard Things

We will discuss the different stages of acceptance you go through in a Rare family. Receiving a diagnosis has a profound impact on your whole family The structure of your family can change in an instant. There is a lot to accept and integrate. 

How do you talk about the hard things? What gets in the way? Join us to shine the light on blocks to communication and learn skillful tools for how to say what you really want to say. 

You Belong

As a Raregiver, you belong here. We gather from across the world to support each other. You are not alone. Come as you are. Your presence is a contribution.

Zoom Link: Click Here

Looking forward to being with you soon,

Padma